Building Without Permission: Creating Your Own Table
From the Leading Unapologetically Series
“I didn’t have a mentor, so I became one.” – Oprah Winfrey
There comes a moment in every woman’s leadership journey when you realize the table you’ve been waiting to be invited to was never built with you in mind. That moment is both painful and liberating. Because it reveals a deeper truth:
You were never meant to wait for a seat.
You were meant to build the damn table.
Redefining Leadership on Your Own Terms
Traditional leadership models weren’t designed for women like us. Not the working moms managing Zoom calls with toddlers in the background. Not the first-generation leaders navigating spaces that weren’t built with our voices in mind. Not the disruptors who show up without a blueprint, but with a vision.
So why keep asking for access when you were born to create?
Leadership isn’t just about climbing—it’s about constructing. It’s what happens when we decide to lead with our values, in our voice, and on our terms.
Sometimes that looks like:
Launching a leadership circle for women who feel unseen at work
Advocating for flexible schedules in systems stuck in rigidity
Modeling authenticity by showing up unmasked and unshrinking
When you lead on your own terms, you don’t just change your path—you shift the culture.
Build What You Need, Then Share It
In all realness: many of us didn’t have a blueprint.
We navigated under fluorescent lights, pushed through side-eyes, and spoke softly under silent ceilings. And yet, we made it! Not because we were handed a map, but because we drew our own.
That journey reveals something powerful:
If the space, support, or solution you needed didn’t (or still doesn’t) exist—create it.
Not just for others. For you, too.
As women, we’re often praised for being endlessly supportive of other people’s goals. But part of leading unapologetically means choosing to support our own gaps and dreams, even when no one else is clapping.
Because if you need it (whatever the “it” is), you’re not alone.
Build it, and your people will find you. This is your own personal “Field of Dreams” moment.
Start the group chat.
Host the brown bag lunch series.
Slide into that new colleague’s inbox and say, “You’ve got this—need a sounding board?”
These aren’t minor gestures.
They are culture-shifting. They are ecosystem-building.
They are infrastructure.
You’re not just mentoring.
You’re modeling what’s possible.
And in doing so, you become the blueprint.
Not just for someone else—but for yourself.
Owning Your Space Without Apology
Here’s the part most of us weren’t taught:
You don’t need permission to take up space.
Say it again: You don’t need permission to take up space.
If your voice shakes the room, let it. If your presence challenges the status quo, good. If your leadership doesn’t fit into neat boxes—it was never meant to.
You’ve earned your expertise through grit, grace, and grind.
You’ve built your credibility on late nights, big vision, and impact that speaks for itself.
So when the moment comes—and it will—when someone questions your right to be in the room, I want you to remember:
You didn’t just pull up a chair.
You built the table.
Lead Authentically. Build Bravely.
This is your season to lead without shrinking, build without blueprints, and speak without softening your brilliance.
You are not waiting for inclusion.
You are the inclusion.
You’re not seeking permission.
You’re setting precedent.
And every table you build becomes a sanctuary for someone who thought they didn’t belong. That’s not ego, that’s legacy.
🖤 Your Leadership Mantra This Week:
I am the architect of my own leadership. I build spaces where others can rise.
Welcome to the revolution, friend.
Let’s keep building—unapologetically.